Switzerland to Create Army of Human-eating Dragons


The Large Hadron Collier is a particle accelerator located near Geneva, Switzerland. Scheduled for completion in June of this year, it may show scientists the universe as it was a trillionth of a second after the Big Bang. Or it may create dragons.

Not if killjoys Walter L. Wagner and Luis Sancho get their way. They filed suit in a district court in Hawaii aimed at preventing use of the collider, which they claim may create a universe destroying black hole. It is unclear whether the two men have realized their role as would-be dragon slayers as well.

From the article:
Dr. Arkani-Hamed said concerning worries about the death of the Earth or universe, “Neither has any merit.” He pointed out that because of the dice-throwing nature of quantum physics, there was some probability of almost anything happening. There is some minuscule probability, he said, “the Large Hadron Collider might make dragons that might eat us up.”

Godspeed, young knights.